ANYONE ELSE'S HOUSE DOING THINGS, support group, Wednesdays 7pm (Crambleside)

I cannot be the only one. I KNOW I'm not the only one because I've seen the Housing Bureau's reclassification list and there are fourteen homes on my block alone that got bumped to "semi-responsive" in the last audit.

My house has started doing things. Small things at first: doors closing when I didn't close them, the thermostat adjusting itself (always two degrees colder than what I set it to, like it has a PREFERENCE). Then the kitchen faucet started running on its own every morning at exactly 6:15, which is when I used to wake up before I changed my schedule. It has not updated to my new schedule. It does not care about my new schedule.

Last week the porch light started turning on whenever my neighbor Dale walks by. Just Dale. Nobody else. I asked Dale about it and he said "yeah, a lot of houses do that to me" and would not elaborate.

I am starting a support group. Wednesdays at 7 PM, Crambleside Community Room B (the one that stays put). If your home has been reclassified or if it's doing things that you did not ask it to do and the Housing Bureau told you to "establish a dialogue" like that's a HELPFUL SUGGESTION, come talk to people who get it.

Bring snacks. My kitchen has started hiding mine.